Place: TYROS






Scribe: FIERY TW*T




SPLASH HASH i.e SPORADIC like not very often, PELEPONESE place down south after the Corinth canal, spell check optional, LAIDBACK i.e any which way with no committee or organisation of any description, HASH…..mmmm well what does Hash mean???….a dish of corned beef and potatoes, a bit of a fuck up, or the stuff you go to Amsterdam to smoke legally….take your pick.


HARE me of course


VENUE Tyros beach front outside the Oceanis hotel


Unusual activities as a limbering up exercise for my run/walk were organised on the beach with Bookmaker kindly letting everyone play with his balls. Coffee Crepe did especially well as she says she has played with them many times, as it is a national game in France….Boneypart didn’t seem to mind, although he did not seem to be as comfortable handling them as his wife…..and yet to be named Myrto had a strange action where she seemed to have to cock her leg to get a good grip….again Yet to be named Richard seemed happy to let Myrto play and even offered sporting advice when things did not go to plan.


Anyway once the game was over we gathered for a circle b4 my much awaited run trail. I had roped in Cleopatra as walk leader and was grateful with that someone of her mountain experience was available as I must admit the walk trail was patchy at least. We had a few Hash virgins and a few Splash Hash ones too but we do not stand on ceremony on the Splash hash so we ignored them all equally.


So what can I say about the trail itself, well it had a bit of an uphill start, which is to be expected if you start at sea level, but that allowed plenty of time to admire the fabulous cliffs raising skyward and then the rest of the trail allowed closer views of the cliffs and donkey tracks and flowers and then views down to the unspoilt beaches and sea views to Spetses and Hydra beyond. I managed to arrange that everyone stayed pretty much together by offering a short cut for the less able and screaming til I was blue in the face at the back markers that insisted on doing the long trail but then decided sauntering was a great pace…. We all met up on the pretty path down to the church and overtook the walkers on the windmill road and were back at the beach in under 2 hours so no whinging to the committee….oops what committee!


Brill….all accounted for…..except for Love Bug, Karmakanik and Chief….well they live locally so they didn’t need showing the way did they…….oh dear they were last spotted at the highest point talking to a little old Greek lady who had burst into tears…..I did not want to have to go up to fetch them….phew just as I opened my 2nd Amstel they jogged in from the wrong direction all smiles….luckily it turned out that it was only that the woman’s husband had died recently….. and nothing to do with them having moved into her house…..


Right then circle….well we don’t really do much circling on the Spash so we had a few photo opportunities with our new Fab t-shirts, care of Prickly Bush and sang a few ditties to amuse the locals including 2 Greek couples who had joined us on the walk/run trail…..shame we haven’t seen them since….


Then we decided it was a good time to name Yet to Be Named Richard… was quite a warm sunny afternoon and he was 1 minute from his hotel room and clean dry clothes, also Tyros has nowhere you can buy bags of ice so we had to do without…..what a lucky boy eh? So we decided to make up for the lack of hypothermia to give him a really appropriate name…..Prickly to the rescue again….we baptised him in beer and sea water with the most appropriate hash moniker ever known……Arise FLOPPY DICK…….!! We told him he could stop saying ‘I am not worthy’ as Myrto had confirmed the appropriate name in advance.


All a bit of an anti-climax after that, as the tart said to the bishop… ON ON to the taverna up the mountain again….I let them take their cars this time though!