17th February 2008
ATHENS HASH - ANNUAL RED DRESS RUN
I arrived at Kifissia station and was amazed to see hundreds of people milling around all wearing red dresses. Suddenly I panicked and thought,
"We won't have enough beer to go round!" Fortunately, that's when I woke up.
The real story follows. No names have been changed to protect the innocent.
have spent the last fifty odd years going through a morning ritual, waking,
washing, weeing, etc. Then dressing - dead easy. I mean, with all those years
of practice you just get into a routine. However this morning was different.
Had to actually think about how to dress myself as a woman in a dress and to
go out in a public place. Ah, well, best foot forward as they say.
I'm afraid the weather had not been kind to us, after all the promoting of this annual event on every media system I could think of. Looked out of my window at six inches of snow with more still falling. Not much chance of getting my car out, but fortunately the train was still running. So my red dress run started from Neratziotissa. A lot of strange looks from the small number of people around. Even had one woman go past me twice just to make sure she was not seeing things. Still, it was only three stops to my destination and then I'd have lots of others dressed alike. Then I would blend in, so to speak.
Leaving the train and looking around for the others all I found was Prickly Bush minus Zak and Black Mamba The latter was in sunnier climes. Then I saw Shiva, a returnee, next to Absolute. The Hare, Rim Job, was across the way putting a Hash sign on his car. This was where we congregated and waited for the rest.......... and waited......and waited.
Coke Dealer and Bones turned up. Funny thing was they were supposed to be skiing
this w/end but, guess what, Snow Job had to cancel it because of the... wait
for it... yes, you got it, SNOW. Can't ski with it, can't ski without it. Funny
stuff, this snow!
Then Stress Cow wandered up, making a whole eight in total, waiting till eleven thirty for the off. I then started the circle in the park and off we all jogged, walked, trotted or whatever.
I had been waiting for someone to say, "Are we running on white?" but no one did. We actually ran on blue and a lot of it was visible but the Hare accompanied us to act as some sort of guide. The Hare himself had had a problem setting the trail - bitten by a dog, no less. He survived. Not sure about the dog. Anyway we went this way and that way. A car managed to drench Coke Dealer and myself - quite refreshing, really NOT.
We all made it back to the starting point and found latecomer Bouboulina waiting for us. We had quite an intimate circle, as you can imagine, because all you lazy Bastards couldn't make it for some reason or other. I wonder what the excuses will be? Too much snow? Didn't want to get red dress wet and other various lame excuses? You should have left home Saturday evening and slept in your cars! How does the song go, "We are Hashers true and blue..........?" Wimps, more like!
Anyhow, lots of down-downs for various misdemeanors - returnees, latecomers, etc. Then two awards made by Rim Job, who, incidentally, ended up as beer bitch 'cos the others couldn't get their hands out of their pockets or something. The two sad people who were awarded badges were Coke Dealer, 75th, and Cook the Fook, 50th.
Shiva then made an award of a condom that she had been given at the Mall, of all places. Her daughter had said she'd better not use it as it might have a pin hole in it so she gave it Prickly Bush 'cos she likes making a tit out of herself. (See photos of Love Bug's run)
Reminds me of a joke. What is the definition of revenge? Answer, " Simple, a Bastard in a condom factory with a pin."
Eventually we came to the most important part, the judging of the best dressed person in a red dress. Bones as judge picked Bouboulina and the prize was an excellent lucky bag full of goodies. No, not condoms! The runner up was Shiva with an enormous bag of kets (it's a northern word for sweeties, so you're getting an education as well as a report). So that almost ended the proceedings, apart from announcing next week's run. The Hare will be Mad Dog (presumably he will be able to make it by then). The venue will appear on the web site in due course.
We lunched at the Three Little Pigs and the food was enjoyed by all. At 10 euros a head that can't be bad
On on You Bastards
Cook the Fook.