Date: 28 May 2007
Scribe & GM: Budwanker
“The Last (probably) Run Hared by the Legendary (in his own mind at least) Budwanker”
Last Monday, in an act of utter desperation following a visiting U.S. Senator and driving rain for most of the day, designated Hare Budwanker decided to try something new and different, a live hare run. So, at the end of a Greek-American three day weekend, the few, the proud, the had nothing better to do showed up to witness the possible debacle for themselves. What they didn’t know, aside from the fact it was a live hare run, was that the hare, sensing that his sore knee and general dislike for leading the pack might lead to him being caught, had taken advantage of a break in the rain to lay a long falsie that would lead the runners far off course and buy him some time.
“How clever am I?” The hare thought to himself. His smugness was quickly shattered however by the sight of Banger and Mash walking up to the start. Noted frontrunners and survivors of many marathons the hare knew he was in trouble. Citing his lack of running prowess, he demanded a full 15 minutes head-start, then set off. Setting a quick falsie he hustled towards the bridge over the Attiki Odos and the long falsie. Hoping to slow down the aforementioned Banger and Mash, not to mention S4S and Mountain Goat, the hare set a check then headed off cross country to slow the pack down. Finally reaching the bridge. Looking back and seeing no pursuit the hare congratulated himself and started off the other direction. Even a brief sighting by BangerMash didn’t cause too many worries, they still had to follow the trail up over the bridge.
Meanwhile, back at the pack, the runners had completely missed the cross country part of the run and made their way up towards the bridge.
“What’s this?” The hashers ask? “The trail goes across the bridge, but the hare is the other way. We don’t want to run across the bridge, it’s scary over there. The other way is downhill, much easier, let’s go the other way.” So, skipping the clever falsie the runners set off downhill in pursuit. (OK, in reality, I set the trails too close together and they just missed the falsie, but my original story sounds better and I’m sticking too it.)
The hare staggered back to the start, followed closely by the pack, BangerMash complaining the run was too short (well yeah, if you skip the 2 KM falsie). Half of BangerMash was so disgusted he took off for an extra run. Clit and The Scarlett Pimp were so disgusted, no, wait, they weren’t disgusted as they pulled an Oxy and showed up as the run ended.
The circle started with the usual foolishness, the Hare got an unusually good score for this pitiful run. Clit and SP were awarded the Oxy award. S4S and Mountain Goat somehow shared the FRB award from Rim Job. SP again showed why he’s the best music maestro in the business, almost getting one song out. Finally, it was off the Budwanker’s for a BBQ and margarita feast.